Discover The Wisdom of Letting Go
When a great Zen Master returned to his country after many years of studying abroad the people asked what he brought with him. He said, "I've come with nothing but empty hands." What are these empty hands? What value are they of us today? Usually our own hands are full, filled with tasks, problems and possessions that seem impossible to put down. Our lives are crowded with decisions, plans and dreams. When these plans are not fulfilled, when events do not go as we would wish, or when change comes unexpectedly, many start to grasp and hold on. This grasping itself increases anxiety. Few know how to truly deal with change or understand why it is happening to them. Living by Zen shows us how to stop clinging and open both our hands and minds to the new possibilities that are always present for us. Holding On Many people's lives are centered around accumulation. They become very proud of what they have accumulated; money, degrees, skills, friends, information, property, lovers. Soon they are so full they can hardly move, and yet they still search for more, cramming every corner of their homes and lives full. Before long, they even believe what they have is who they are. It is not so easy to stop accumulating and simply clean out the drawers. Many have not yet learned the value of empty space. Along with the process of accumulation, the process of attachment appears. Many become afraid of losing that which they have. Everything seems precious, no matter what. How often do they stop and ask, "Do I need this anymore? Is it still valuable? When is it time to let go?" How We Know Ourselves Most of us feel we are our job, possessions, achievements, and relationships. This is how we know ourselves. If we lose one of them, we feel we have lost part of ourselves. Somehow we have not identified with the basis of all life, which is constantly moving, changing, growing. In order to expand our sense of selves it is necessary to stop fighting and resisting life, to become willing to let go. But, whether or not we want to let go, life itself decides for us. Change comes in its own time, both giving and taking things away. When this happens, many suffer greatly from this sense of loss. A usual response is to hold on tighter. When Change Comes When change comes, the first thing we must realize is that the harder we hold on, the more we crush what we have in the palm of our hands. This is not the way to avoid suffering. In fact, the pain of loss is caused by resistance to what is going on. The more we fight what is happening, the more we resist the natural flow of life, the more we suffer and helpless we can feel. There are many ways we hold on and resist what is happening in our lives - through domination, depression, denial, endless activity, immediately making new plans. By fighting change this way we are insisting that life meet our particular demands, fulfill our needs and expectations. A battle is set up. Much energy is squandered. As we live by Zen, we find a different way of approaching change. When change, loss or disturbance comes, we plant ourselves in the center of the storm and allow ourselves to fully experience what is going on. Instead of being blown all over by the turbulence, we become the center of the tornado, filled with energy and focus. We let go of the ways we "think" things should be going and allow ourselves to fully be with what is. As we do this a great question arises - what do we really have that we can lose? This question is called a koan; a question that cannot be answered rationally. As we work on this koan, our minds, heart and hands become empty, open and clear for a new way of understanding and being. As we stop clinging, and start letting go into the truth of the moment, we discover who we truly are and are filled with fresh wisdom. Now as we are living by Zen fears diminish, grasping lets go and our sense of being becomes planted on a stable foundation. In this process we begin to experience life differently and also have a taste of who we truly are. Our hands then become empty too. Empty hands are pliable, flexible, and useful. They can touch and comfort, they can give and receive, they can do what is needed when the moment appears. Cc/2005 Discover 2,000 year old Zen secrets to being calm, balanced and positive, no matter what is going on in your life through Living By Zen, (Timeless Truths For Everyday Life), http://www.livingbyzen.com by Dr. Brenda Shoshanna. She is a psychologist, speaker and workshop leader, long term Zen practitioner and teacher and also author of Zen Miracles, (Finding Peace In An Insane World), Wiley, 2002, Zen and the Art of Falling In Love and other books. Dr. Shoshanna teaches in universities, the community, online for Barnes And Noble University and is relationship expert on http://www.ivillage.com. Her wonderful program on Living By Zen is available at http://www.livingbyzen.com (Contact her at mailto:topspeaker@yahoo.com. (212) 288-0028.)
MORE RESOURCES:
'Gentle' yoga can benefit elderly or infirmPittsburgh Post Gazette, PA - 50 minutes agoBy Dave Zuchowski She put her belief into practice Thursday when she led her first class in "gentle yoga" at California's Center in the Woods. ... |
Eye yoga, anyone?Daily News & Analysis, India - 11 hours agoDr Kunti Nagvekar from India, one of the members of the Natural Vision Improvement Group, has coined this concept as Sampoorn eye yoga. ... |
If Sarah Palin Did Yoga... (VIDEO)Huffington Post, NY - 16 hours agoI don't know if Sarah would be into trying yoga. It can be a fairly meditative practice that involves self-observation. Also, I'm pretty sure it's not ... |
Yoga marathon at Marion Square for a good causeTheDigitel, SC - 19 hours agoSome of Charleston’s most popular yoga instructors will be at Marion Square on Saturday, October 11, from noon to 2 pm for the 5th Annual yoga-thon to raise ... |
Yoga - Google News
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Three Tips for Forgiveness: A Key Factor in Anger Management
Elizabeth, 32, cried during anger management class as she told how one year ago - her 19-month-old girl was permanently brain-damaged as the result of a medical error at the hospital in which she was delivered.Elizabeth had a legitimate grievance toward the hospital and medical staff, and felt that she could never forgive them for
what she saw as their incompetence.
Stress Management and Mastery: Watch Your Language
"Watch your language."We all heard this admonition as kids and probably say it to our own kids as well.
Getting Rid of Your Frustrations
Punch a pillowScream into a pillowTurn on your favorite music and dance, sing..
5 Top Tips To Boost Your Spirits
1. Take a relaxing bath.
Do You Have Your Foot On The Pedal? Are You Overwhelmed At Work?
Is your in-tray or inbox full? I don't normally check the time that emails are sent to me, but for some reason I noticed that Nadia's message had been
sent at 2am. In her email she explained that she really needed some help, to deal with all the stress in her life:This morning I rushed out of the house before the kids got
up.
Just Breathe - Is This Your Missing Link ?
Breathing is the vital force of life. It is considered to be the mind-body bridge.
Stress Secrets: How To Remove Hidden Sources Of Stress
Most people find it easy to identify the sources of stress in their lives. Ask Maggie M.
The Best Medicine For Stress ( A Daily Dose Of Gratitude)
There is one sure fire medicine that cures all difficulty and opens the way for your greatest good. It allows you to sleep well at night, wake up refreshed and filled with enthusiasm.
Overcoming Stress: Successful Living The Easy Way
So many of us live a stressful life. Unfortunately, when we are unable to take the time that we all need to nurture ourselves we fall victim to self-pity, depression, or burn-out.
Stress Management:: 4 Critical Distinctions
Stress Vs PressureStress is something we all have, it's not going away, it's a sign we are alive. The question is in how you handle it.
Dealing With Frustration
If you're like most people, you have your bouts of frustration, for sure. Not everyone handles these episodes in the same manner, as you most likely already know.
Seven Simple Steps to a Stress-Free Start
Most of us lead busy lives, trying to successfully juggle the responsibilities of home and work and personal interests into one cohesive happy life. There is nothing that could better start your busy day than having a smooth stress-free morning.
Busy Fish: Tips for Changing Your Day from Chaos to Calm
Syndicated columnist Dale Dauten recently wrote, "One of life's great joys that we've lost is that of the empty day, a day given over to quiet, to reading and contemplation. Our planners and PDAs give the illusion of importance and of being in control.
Stress Managment: 5 Things to Clean Out of Your Mental Closet
ExcusesWe all have them. It amazes me how creative I can be when I need a good excuse for something.
It is Looking Up for Stress Relief
No this is not related to praying, this is how your brain works. Looking up will reduce your stress?.
How Stress Effects Neurotransmitters
The brain uses feel-good transmitters called endorphins when managing daily stress. When the brain requires larger amounts of endorphins to handle increased stress, the ratio of many of the other transmitters, one to another, becomes upset creating a chemical imbalance.
Stress Management: 7 Universal Laws for Managing Change
1. The Law of StagnationThis is also known as first order change.
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About How to Get a Life, But Didnt Know Whom to Ask
Question 1"How do I get more time to play?"Answer:
Schedule it in.
Why? Because if you don't schedule it you will generally let other things have a higher priority and put yourself and a life further down the list.
How To Recognize Stress And Its Effects Before It Takes You Over
Stress affects different people in different ways, but affect them it does. Whether you recognize it or not, if you are stressed, it is only a matter of time before something has to give - and that something is likely to be you!So what exactly is stress, and what does it do to you?Stress is a collective term for a whole series of effects, mental, physical and emotional, that occur as a result of excess.
How To Reduce Stress and Ease Worries in Just 3 Minutes
Meditation, relaxation and visualisation are the standard recommendations for reducing stress, and they are all beneficial and useful to us in many ways, however, they are not so easy to put into use when stress strikes with it's disruptive companions frustration, overwhelm, confusion, anxiety etc in full attendance.Here's something simple you can try to diffuse stress quickly and easily, anytime
and anywhere.
|
